It's Not Business as Usual-Not by a Long Shot

I’ve written several blogs in the past week…but haven’t posted any.

It just seems disrespectful during these tumultuous times.

I want to smile and laugh. I’d love to be carefree. And I’d like to make other people smile if I could. But it’s nearly impossible to get back to business as usual.

Because nothing about life right now is business as usual.

Covid-19 is still a “thing” – even though it seems to have been pushed to the bottom of the page. Yet I still must wear a mask when I go to the grocery store. And I still cannot visit my mom inside her memory care unit, put my arms around her and tell her I love her.

Other events have come to the forefront that prevent business as usual.

If you’re like me, you are horrified, saddened and angered by the senseless killing of George Floyd. I don’t think I will ever get the image out of my head of now-fired and charged police officer, Derek Chauvin, with his hand in his pocket, kneeling on Floyd’s neck while Floyd begs to be let up so he can breathe.

Kneeling on a man’s neck with his hand in his pocket just screams nonchalance to me. As if it were no big deal.

Oh, but it was a very big deal.

Since that time, social media has been drowning us with videos, memes and commentaries.

Some are heartening to see: peaceful protesters waving placards reading “Black Lives Matter.” Operative word in that sentence: “peaceful.”

I watched a video last night that made me cry. The police (don’t ask me where) were holding a line and the protesters were standing almost face to face with the officers.

I worried as I was watching that violence was going to ensue. But suddenly, I saw officers putting out their hands to shake the hands of the protesters. And then there were hugs on both sides of the line. It was a lovely image that I wished were the case in every city protest.

But then I’ve also seen videos that made me cry for a different reason – the video out of Buffalo, NY, where an elderly man was shoved by an officer in riot gear enforcing a curfew. The sight of the man on the ground bleeding from his ear was absolutely horrifying.

And I pray that he recovers with no ill effects.

Did the officer mean to shove the man so hard he fell and was injured? What could the protester possibly have said to cause such a reaction?

I don’t know – and I don’t really care.

It is 2020. There are cameras everywhere. What actions may have been hidden in the past and covered up with lies are now exposed with every cell phone camera video.

So our actions have consequences. Even if we didn’t mean it. Or didn’t mean for things to go so far.

We can’t blanket statement anything these days – and we shouldn’t. There are good people and bad people. There are good, courageous men and women who put on that blue uniform every day to keep us safe.

Just as there are those who don’t deserve to wear that uniform.

There are good citizens of every creed and color. And there are bad people of the same.

What we must do is hold ourselves – and our officials – accountable. Which, to me, is what the protests are about. And I applaud that.

What I don’t applaud is the violence or the rioting or the looting or the senseless destruction of property and burning of buildings.

How does this help? How can it possibly help?

I just read that a friend of mine in Cleveland was attacked, pistol whipped and his car stolen in a random act of violence during this turbulent time. I’m grateful he is going to be all right, but he is hurting right now – in both body and soul.

And for that, I’m sorry.

I wish I could make things better. I wish I had a solution and could magically make people treat each other right. Where we could all live together in peace.

Where mothers would never have to sit with their children of color and give them “the talk” – the one where they have to tell them how to behave if they are ever pulled over or stopped by the police.

And I think of those fresh-faced, beautiful children and I hope that by the time they are adults, the world will be a little better and they won’t have to fear being held down on the ground with a knee on their neck as they beg for breath.

So, no. Nothing about life right now is “business as usual.”

And that’s the point.