Monday, May 9, 2022

Photo-Op?


For a year I’ve kept the same profile photo on Facebook. An entire year. And I had formerly been one of those people who changed her profile pic pretty much as often as she changed her undies.

 

Well, okay, so that’s not true. I’m not THAT narcissistic. (And, yes, I DO change my undies every day – don’t be gross!)

 

It’s not that it was such a wonderful photo of me that I just held onto it. But it was taken at Gervasi Vineyard, which was the last trip that Vince and I took together as well as the last photo of the two of us.

 


So it felt like I was being disloyal to him to think about taking it down and changing it up.

 

What I’ve realized in the past year is that some of the spark has gone out of my eyes and my photos aren’t nearly as good anymore. That’s probably because in the “before” I was either in a picture together with Vince – or he was the one taking my photo. And he took those photographs with such love, I couldn’t help but be happy – and that happiness was reflected in my pictures.

 

Well, either that – or I’m just getting too old and wrinkly to take a good photo anymore. Haha.

 

Besides, frankly, I don’t have anyone aiming his camera at me constantly, so there are far fewer pictures from which to choose.

 

But I know I must look forward and can’t constantly dwell in the past. Am I guilty of plunking myself smack dab in the past and refusing to move on? Sure, from time to time. But only momentarily. I have to believe we all do this on occasion. Memories are powerful and we know that our past has helped shaped us to be the people we are today.

 

Yet I know I don’t want to be one of those people who, because she lost the love of her life, can’t get out of bed in the morning and continue to live her best life. Vince would hate that for me.

 

So I finally changed my profile picture. It’s a selfie and, thus, a little too close-up for my taste. But, because I actually fixed my hair and applied makeup, which is not an everyday occurrence anymore, I decided it was a good time to give it a shot. (So to speak.)

 

But, um, I’m standing in front of Vince’s T-shirt quilt, so I guess I haven’t completely moved on.

 

Oh well. Baby steps.

 

Before I changed my photo, I was talking about it with a friend. And I related the story about how Vince and I met. Which was online. And he didn’t even have his photo as his profile pic. It was a shot of a coral reef that someone who had set up his profile for him, plugged into the spot where his photo should go. But as this was the beginning of the Age of Social Media for Old(er) Folks, Vince didn’t know how to change it, so he left the coral reef.

 

For the first couple weeks during our online correspondence, I didn’t even know what “vncord” looked like. And that was okay. I maintained back then that I wasn’t looking for a date – just someone to talk to. Yeah, in retrospect, I’m so very glad that (a) Vince was persistent in asking me out and (b) I came around to the notion of going out on a date with someone I met online.

 

I know a lot of people don’t use their own photos in their profile. They substitute their pet or a flower or a picture of their latest tattoo. I even had one friend use a close-up picture of her eyeball as her profile pic. I have to admit, that was a little disconcerting, even though it was a lovely eye.

 

Maybe I’ll branch out and stop putting my own face out there. I could instead use a picture of my big toe? Yeah…no, I don’t think so. Even with the pretty nail polish, my toes are not exactly photo-worthy.

 

Or how about a photo of the spiky weed that is growing near my garage that I refuse to pull since I’d have to dig out the gardening gloves that I promised myself I wouldn’t need again?

 

Again, that’d be a “no.”  People will get the impression I’m lazy. And that would be a shame since my message is supposed to be: I don’t like digging in the dirt!

 

Oh well, for now I guess I’ll just stick with my own imperfect, too-close-up face. Tomorrow I can decide if that weed is photo-worthy. 

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