Since we were not able to have a formal service for our mother upon her passing, we thought it would be appropriate to share some of our favorite memories of her on what would have been her 96th birthday today. 
Cocktail hour-No kids allowed!
As my sister Denise has previously said, our mom could be fierce (in a good way), but she could also be extremely loving and caring.
Our parents were of the very strict, old-school type and you lived by their very well-established rules.
When we were kids, they had what was called the Cocktail Hour every evening after my dad got home from work. It was understood that they were not to be disturbed unless you had previously made an appointment to talk to them during that hour. The appointments were only to be made for major life decisions and you had to be prepared with your presentation and be ready to discuss all the pros and cons. My parents were excellent debaters. It was serious stuff!
When I was 17, I had this notion that I wanted to join the armed forces. I made my appointment with them and thoroughly presented my case and explained my reasoning. They were initially very much against it, but eventually acquiesced because they knew I would do it as soon as I turned 18 anyway. I did inherit the stubbornness trait from my mother after all, and I wear it proudly.
The day I was to leave for basic training in Georgia, my mom announced that she wanted to drive me to the airport herself. I was immediately worried. Growing up in a family with three other siblings made it a rare event to spend time with my mom alone. I spent a lot of time with my dad growing up, but almost never with Mom.
On the way to the airport we stopped at a Big Boy restaurant for lunch. Another extremely rare event. In my entire life, I only ever ate out with my mom by myself three times - this was the first. The next two were not until over 30 years later when Dad was in the hospital. It wasn't that I didn't want to - it was because my mom and dad were inseparable and I never would have thought to ask to dine out with just my mom.
Anyway, at that lunch Mom said the reason she wanted to drive me to the airport was because she wanted to spend time with me on the day I changed from a boy to a man. I think she thought that on that day I was not a boy anymore. (Truth be told, I don't think I have matured much since I was 17!)
I must admit, it made me tear up that day - and it still does now when I think about it.
Lunch went by way too fast and I wished I had a recording of it because I know it was the first time I ever had a conversation with my mom as an adult.
After lunch we continued to the airport and my mom gave me what I am sure is the longest hug we ever shared. Years later she told me that she cried the whole way home from the airport.
It is one of my favorite memories of my mom and it makes me wish I had asked her to go out to eat, just ourselves, many more times than we had.
I have learned to not miss what seem like very small opportunities because they can be the memories that mean the most later.
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