Saturday, September 6, 2014

Happy 5th Anniversary to My Vince

Today is our fifth wedding anniversary and some smart aleck, who shall remain nameless, said he lost a bet to Dad that we wouldn’t make it five years.

A lot you know, Andrew. Oops! He was supposed to remain nameless.

But I know he’s kidding. He couldn’t possibly have thought I’d waited nearly 50 years before finally tying the knot for the first time only to have that knot unravel before five years were up.

Clearly, I don’t rush into anything and I couldn’t possibly be called a trailblazer.

But I was waiting for the right person to show up. And I was truly okay with staying single. Forever, if it came to it. I think I’ve said it before, but I would much rather have remained single than to have been married to the wrong person.

But Vince is definitely the right person. He’s so good to me. He loves me for my good qualities and accepts me despite my faults and foibles. He lets me love him.  And we’re good together.

The relationships I had before Vince were good – but never good enough. When I was younger, I always thought if I did the wrong thing, I wouldn’t be accepted and loved.  There were times I was afraid to say the “L” word for fear I’d be rejected.  And there were times I thought I’d need to change and be someone I wasn’t in order to keep the person I was with.

That’s so sad. And thank goodness my mama didn’t raise no dummy – I got over those thoughts right quick!

But, seriously, I didn’t realize how easy love can be. And how, when you’re with the right person, life can be so incredibly good.

Don’t get me wrong – it’s not that we haven’t had our share of struggles.  But, for the most part, they are insignificant because we face them together. And we still talk about things all the time – the good, the bad and the ugly. That helps us connect with each other to resolve issues.  

But no matter how hard we try, we always joke that we can’t hope to measure up to the longevity of my parents’ marriage. Not that our marriage is doomed – but my parents have been married for sixty-two years. Given our current ages, I’m pretty sure we won’t still be kickin’ it in fifty-seven years. (Or if we are, it’s a good bet that we won’t remember our own names let alone the fact that we’re married to each other!)

I have been blessed with parents who have shown me, by example, what real love and commitment is all about. They have had their share of ups and downs and have lived through raising four children (some of whom were angels and some of whom were…well, never mind!). They have had more than their share of medical scares and hospital stays. Yet through it all they stayed true and strong and in love. They still smooch every morning and every night. (Ooh. Sorry if that was too graphic.)  They still hold hands when they go for a walk. And they love each other – plain and simple.

I believe that is what I have found in Vince. I hope we don’t have to worry about medical scares and hospital stays – and I know we don’t have to worry about the raising the four children thing at this point in our lives – but I look forward to the years ahead we have together. And I’m grateful for every moment.


Happy 5th Anniversary, Vince. I love you!

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